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Why would God hurt someone He truly loves?
The road of life is a bumpy ride.
Some people have more bumps than others. But everyone has them.
The question is, why? Why does God make life so challenging?
God loves each and every one of us unconditionally. His love is the most genuine love that exists because it depends on nothing. His love is bigger than our mistakes and insecurities. His love for us is infinitely deep because He is infinitely deep. It will never cease like He will never cease.
Why would God hurt someone He truly loves?
Can you think of an instance where you would, in fact, hurt someone you love? There isn’t a loving mother in the world who has not brought her child to a dentist despite the fact that the drilling will hurt. She might even have to hold him down during the process. Loving parents will subject their child to life saving surgery, even though the recovery will be painful.
We will hurt someone we love when the outcome is worth the pain. Preserving your teeth is worth a half-hour of painful drilling. Survival outweighs six months of post-op. There are times we will hurt a person we love because we love them.
We make the common mistake of thinking that pain is bad. Pain may be undesirable or unpleasant, but it’s not bad. The proof is that we will give ourselves pain at times. We go to the gym or take an injection. We climb mountains and give birth. These activities are painful. Yet we engage in them enthusiastically, because the pain is worth it.
We don’t really mind pain. What we mind is pointless pain. But if there is a point to the pain, we engage in it.
A striking analogy to this idea is made by the great Chasidic master, Rabbi Kolonymus Kalman Shapira, who was known as the Piaseczner Rebbe, the Rabbi of the Warsaw Ghetto. Rabbi Shapira suffered the tortures of the Holocaust and spent three years in the Warsaw Ghetto. After losing his loved ones, he was killed by the Nazis in a labor camp. With tremendous faith and strength, he taught Torah in the ghetto, inspiring the masses despite the hell they were living through. He even wrote a searing book about faith while he was there, titled Aish Kodesh, Holy Fire. In one of his earlier works, Chovat HaTalmidim (A Student’s Obligation, Chapter 12) he writes, “Stand a farmer to shake his sickle without a stalk or weeds to cut, he couldn’t keep it up for half an hour.” Rabbi Shapira is pointing out that human beings will accept pain unless there is no underlying purpose. If there is meaning to the pain, we will withstand it.
Amazingly, there are times when we even take pleasure in the pain itself. We pay premium membership fees to the gym and workout. Feel the burn! We run marathons and love it, despite the sore muscles.
People confuse comfort for pleasure, choosing to run away from challenge and pain. Genuine pleasure necessarily comes through pain and exertion. As the Piaseczner Rebbe so succinctly points out in Chovat HaTalmidim (Chapter 9), “The only thing that can be accomplished without work is rotting in the grave. Nothing more.” One who is willing to pay the price of exertion to accomplish will enjoy the effort, even though it hurts.
And that’s why life is a bumpy road. You want those whom you love to attain real pleasure.
Every bump is placed by a Being who loves you deeply. Our personal challenges have been calibrated to give us the opportunity to become stronger, to bring out our inner potential. If we embrace the challenge and grow, the greatness we will attain will be worth the pain of what we went through. Just as a workout builds physical muscles, exertion through life’s challenges builds inner muscles. The bumps in our life’s road are our personal chin-up bars.
One of the most deeply satisfying pleasures in life is mastering our self-development. The Piaseczner Rebbe (Derech Hamelech, Rosh Hashana, Leil Alef, 5691) says that a person who builds himself, specifically through challenge, will experience a wellspring of happiness from becoming who he can, despite the pain he is going through. This can be experienced even in the Warsaw Ghetto.
The Piaseczner Rebbe (Chovat HaTalmidim, Chapter 4), writes, “The amount of work necessary to acquire something corresponds to the value of what is being attained. Silly and worthless items can be acquired without much labor, while precious items require work to obtain.” You are precious and who you can become is precious. While it may take much effort, self-mastery is worth it. Your inner greatness is worth fighting for.
So why would a loving God cause me pain?
Because He loves me..
This article is based on Rabbi Meir B. Kahane’s higly acclaimed A Fire in the Darkness: Guidance for Growth When Life Hurts, a masterful guide for personal growth based on the monumental work Aish Kodesh authored by the Piaseczner Rebbe. The Rebbe wrote Aish Kodesh during the Holocaust while in the Warsaw Ghetto and in it addresses the weighty issues of pain and suffering specifically in light of a good G-d. The Rebbe gives insightful and practical guidance for growth during even the most painful of times and in doing so powerfully demonstrates that there is nothing people go through that they can’t grow from- even a Holocaust. In A Fire in the Darkness, Rabbi Kahane expounds upon the Rebbe’s wisdom, providing the guidance that we desperately seek today.
A Fire in the Darkness can be purchased at https://menuchapublishers.com/ or from Amazon and eBay or from fine Jewish bookstores around the globe.
Reprinted from Aish.com